If I were a superstitious person, Id say the gods didnt want tonights show to happen.
But this is showbiz, PopWatchers, and that shizz, it goeson.
(Did you know those poor suckers have to dress up?)
Credit: Ray Mickshaw/American Idol/Getty Images
Grab the first seat you see!
a page yelled, as people haphazardly wandered down the aisles.
Just grab a seat!
Whose call was it to avoid tickets?
I heard one page say as she passed me, trying to herd the masses.
Ricky Minor to the stage, like, a stage manager said over the P.A.
Wherever your seat is supposed to be, sit in it!
With 15 minutes to go, Cory appeared (in a jaunty scarf!)
and, skipping his usual antics, began to plead with the audience to sit down.
I said to the journalist in front of me.
No way does he have that note!
And yet omg, Danny Gokey was fully of the belief that he could hit that note.
I grabbed my friends shoulder.
He aimed for the note, landed in a neighboring county, trailed off.
With four minutes to go, they started his snippet again.
With 30 seconds to spare, the judges walked in.
We are coming to youverylive, said Ry-Ry after hed successfully navigated the death stairs.
Rickey Minor was workin it, though, dawg, and the audience was on its feet.
Towards the end, Glamberrrrr paused, and several people clapped as though he was done.
Hey, at least they finally made the Glambomb go first.
Across the room, a woman held up a sign that read, Thank You, AT&T!
But did she deserve to get slaughtered by the judges?
To repeat, for emphasis:NO.
I began to seethe, ever so slightly.
I mean, would it have killed them to do an actual duet?
Every kid at my high school could play that song in 1990.
But no, rock = bombast, and bombast we did get.
Youre sobad, I saw Kara mouth.
I want to talk, but we have 12 seconds!
Why are we always doing a live show?
I want Kris to succeed.
But may I redirect your attention tothis Carly Smithson video?
Cory gave an iPod to a pretty coed from UCLA.
I have no words.
I mean, I have like a gazillion words, but Im going to leave the irate to Slezak.
Instead, Im just going with this:
Yeah.
But you gotta love those judges: always on message.
He gets an A+ for effort!
No, an A++!
He handled a tricky genre with ease!
Rock is a tricky genre??)
(Again, would it have killed them to dig a little deeper?
Im not asking for much.
Under Pressure, maybe.
Nothings Gonna Stop Us Now?
Thats right, I would have preferred Starship, people, and Im not afraid to admit it.)
Still, the crowd was pleased, and a chant of Top 2!
started up in the house right bleachers.
Somewhere, I hope Howard Dean is smiling.
She leapt, she spidered about, she did pushups behind the judges table like Jack Palance reincarnated.
Second take sounded better, and was no less contained.
The Final Four had vanished.
His was, hands down, the performance of the night.
The comment section is open.
Im trying to get an address where well-wishers can send cards, or Diet Cokes, or blended margaritas.
Stay tuned, and Ill see ya tomorrow night.
Meanwhile, rock on, if its not too tricky for ya.
