Simon Cowell giving advice about how to win a Miss Congeniality plaque.
Randy Jackson invoking the name Keyshia Cole.
Kara DioGuardi using numbers in a critique.
Credit: Frank Micelotta/American Idol/Getty Images(2); Michael Becker/Fox
Aaaaaaand…end of rant!
Okay, not really.
So what if one contestants bunky song arrangement gets labeled self-indulgent, while another ones is labeled great?
So what if the term pimp lighting reached new and ridiculous definitions tonight?
With that in mind, lets start the TV Watch!
Wonders somewhat frantic original.
critique: Two words: Standing.
She went there!)
NEXT PAGE: Adam Lambert: Tangled up in (brilliant) blue
2.
I, however, consider myself a little less rigid.
The panic-stricken worker in the first week at a new job.
The guest who shows up at a party and realizes, Oh, crap!
I dont know anyone here but the host.
Theres something really special about a musical performance that can transport you to any number of places or scenarios.
this was really all about Glambert.
Sure, the guy pulled a Kris Allen and botched that final falsetto note, but so what?
My only complaint was the way the producers bathed Adam in a tidal wave of blue light.
HIS NAME IS ADAM!
But then Simon probably would not have leapt to his feet for a standing ovation.
Paula was also correct (!)
response or I mightve launched half a chicken club sandwich at my TV screen.
And just keeping it really real, no one benefits from that kind of doomsday dinnertime scenario.
NEXT PAGE: Karaoke Lil
4.
Ladies and gents, avert your eyes and ears!
This will all be over in 90 seconds!
So why is his baseline talent level coming as a huge shocker to ya?
And trust me, they dont get paid enough forthat!
NEXT PAGE: Math in Karaland
7.
Simon got some tutoring in math from Kara.Okay, folks, pay attention!
And now, apparently, good + lazy + terrific = great!
Okay, okay, okay…let me give the guy a little credit.
Was that a thinly veiled reference to the fact that he made a timeless classic sound like elevator music?
Third floor: Ladies evening wear, night glamour, and hackneyed arrangements!
Uh-huh, I said it!
Your only goal as anIdolcontestant, in fact, is to stay the heck away from em!
Not that Kriss jarring, horn-centric arrangement of All She Wants to Do Is Dance helped much.
Heres hoping America forgives him his one bad night, though.
After all, theyve extended far greater courtesies to Scott and Lil over the past five weeks.
And now, our letter grades of tonights performances!
Who will and should go home?
What moment thrilled you the most, and which made you most furious?
Anyone stick around forFringe?
Idolatry: Megan on rude judges
