I wasoptimisticwhenUnREALpremiered back in February.
Season 2 was shaky, and forever ago, and contained a couple instances of High Sharkjumpery.
But a TV series that doesnt try jumping a couple sharks by season 3 probably isnt taking enough risks.
Credit: Bettina Strauss/Lifetime; Inset:
And Februarys premiere promised a clever reset.
And the main characters all promised to never talk about that whole double murder thing.
Ive never quite seen a relationship like this on a TV show.
Quinn is Rachels mentor, but also her constant tempter, like if Obi-Wan Kenobi was also the Emperor.
Rachel is the hopeful optimist with big ideas contrasting Quinns blunt cynicism.
We know this, unfortunately, because season 3 was often terrible.
Quinn fared no better.
At one point, Quinn saved her job because Garycouldnt finish his speech about firing her.
At one point, the wonderful Tracie Thoms joined the cast as Quinns friend, Fiona.
Here were her plot points:
It was all whiplash, all the time.
Poor Jeremy (Josh Kelly) kept talking about that whole double murder thing.
The one fascinating character onEverlastingthis season was the chef played by Terry Chen.
I want to be bi!
UnREALneeded more of that spirit, the feeling that each character has a private goal underpinning their public narrative.
The worst foundational idea season 3 had was making Serena the first True Believer inEverlastings mission.
Despite consistent demonstrations of her intelligence, this all-encompassing character arc made Serena vastly more naive than Suitors past.
Also: Serena saved a cute little girl from being killed in a car crash.
This was not a successful season ofUnREALin any way.
Ratings, never huge, were low.
Cant wait for Twitter to get ahold of that!
Quinn would say, a line Twitter never got ahold of.Everlastings ratings were always getting higher and higher.
Characters spoke with semiotic eloquence about how everything happening to Serena definitely symbolized something.
Healing a divided nation or the death of feminism, both very hot right now!
was something Fiona just said off the cuff.
Chets quest for an Emmy felt like a very meta expression forUnREALs own, ever-less-likely awards campaign.
Here was a show where someone used the word zeitgeist-y, and then someone else used the word zeitgeist-y.
Im not sure season 3 will inspire half that many thinkpieces.
Lifetimealready greenlit a fourth season, which has started filming.
Reportedly, it will only have eight episodes, a cutback that feels like an endgame.
Its a bummer, if were near the end.
It was bleak, and smart, and fun.
Season 3 was just bleak.
No more patriarchal bullst!
said Fiona in the finale.
But matriarchal bullst is still cool, right?
Meanwhile, Rachels all alone in a cabin in the woods.
And Serenas all alone with her dating app.
(Also, erp, that nice therapist guy was a freaky stalker.
When two characters in a single season develop a Freaky Stalker twist, things have trended downwards.)
Can the fourth season recover the lost mojo?
I hold out hope.
Also, it seems unthinkable that the show could treat an All-Stars season with Serena-ish sincerity.
Im ride-or-die for this show.
This was matched byUnREALs depiction of show business, which trended ever more absurd.
In season 2, it was a fascinating wreck.
Season 3 wasnt much of anything.
But Ill be back for more.
Quinn had it right.
