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Hes hosting as fast as he can! He couldnt wait to pick her up and swing her around.Something hes good at! Ill forever remember him in this exact pose. Credit: Craig Sjodin/ABC Thank God he was wearing his samba shirt, as I prefer myDWTSmemories to be as bedazzled as possible. Did anyone else catch Ty onJimmy Kimmel Livelater on? He said doctors have put his hand in books! How the heck didDancing With the Starsnot capitalize on this oddity that they wouldnt even need to script?...

Felt most comfortable when encased in full-length bodysuits. Not a peep from the devilish man whos hosting as fast as he can. Very sneaky, Mr. Bergeron. Credit: Craig Sjodin/ABC Last nights ouster of Lil Kim and Derek was truly the WTF? moment of season 8. I love me someDance Center, even if this seasons segment didnt pack the bedazzling punch it usually does. (Cul-de-sacs another word for dead end…and thats where this conversation is going....

Season 13’s Movie Night brings sparkling cameos from favorite band members new and old – and Cher! Week 4 onDancing With the Starsseason 13 was Movie Night! You know what that means. Credit: ABC No, not Cher oodles of loving closeups on some of our most cherished Harold Wheeler Band members! Enthusiastic Chimes Lady got to solo on the slide whistleandthe xylophone. Impeccably Manicured Trumpeter blended in alongside equally groomed brass tacks!...

Hughley and Cheryl Burke. Man oh man, were they ready to go. Im glad the comedian got one more dig at mean old Len (D.L. Credit: ABC Its hard to be this bad for this long at something, D.L. told EW after the show. I feel like I forgot who I was. [Read more.] But Im burying the lede here: Tristan and Sean are in love! Quit playing games with Tristans heart, man!...

On Monday, Bruno whipped out the 3 paddle from his magical box of tools. Plus, there was mysterious booing in the ballroom, and no one knew why! They even showed a tape…of the judges. Credit: Adam Larkey/ABC(2) So Boo-gate is settled. As I jot down this. This didnt mean the world to him. (Rick Fox and Brandy were announced safe just prior.) Some of these rituals seemed so ludicrous I was convinced they were half-baked jokes....

Speaking of our pros, who was that tall hot guy you didnt know? That man can forego a shirt and ignore the nonexistent buttons on his vest whenever he pleases. (Maybe next season?) Credit: Craig Sjodin/ABC And then Tom Bergeron and Bob Saget would join her for a rousing song-and-dance rendition of this weeksSurviving Suburbiapromo. I better stop giving them (such obscenely terrible) ideas. Oh, hey, its Ty Murray showing us how to send a text message....

Hes probably never seen the show. After being prompted by Brookes synthetic ponytail to address Chelsie, Jake called her one of his best friends. Not sure how Chelsie felt about that. Credit: Craig Sjodin/ABC It generally seemed like she never really understood anything he was saying. Shed just nod and bravely smirk. What the hell was he ever talking about? Why was he thanking Canada? Silly, tied-down Bachelor. You know youll miss her!...

A dancer heads home to normal life (boo! ); Nicki Minaj and James Blunt perform Spoiler alert: You dont get one! Not with that headline. Credit: ABC (And especially not if youre crazy enough to understand it.) Its now a part of me, and Louis helped me find it. What a classy exit for the bunny who originally inspired DANCMSTR Len Goodman to use the term chesticles. Mamas coming home, Little Hank!...

More power to him for that. I will miss hearing his stories, his partner Ashly told my colleague Lynette Rice after last nights show. I wish everybody could hear what he was telling me. Credit: Craig Sjodin/ABC Read EWs post-show interview with Buzz and Ashly over at Hollywood Insider. (Or as DANCMSTR would have it, a-season ten-sion!) Stand up and salute the astronaut, everyone. Good cast, good cast. Whos a good cast?...

But there was no sneaky You are…safe…from further fracturing your ribcage! WasLostairing one night early? Then, later on, Anya Garnis (c’mon. Credit: Craig Sjodin/ABC Buy a new dress.) and Pasha Kovalev (Hiiiiii!) (Still not sure why those two women even bothered to stand behind microphones.) You dont need to audition, you know! Ashton bragged about her versatility after Genya flat-out admitted he didnt remember how to do the quickstep. Thats kind of an important requirement, buddy....

Annie Barrett sees Carmen Electra Stand on a Chair! A Filler Segment About Costumes! And another Star gets kicked – literally? Credit: Craig Sjodin/ABC (Did anyone catch that last night? Im surprised Jorge Garcia didnt sprint away.) Well miss you and your suitable-for-primetime self-editing, Steve-O. Steve-O, come back! First up, for the bands No. (You know, with the two triangles.) Its probably fine, though. Tony is totally the throw in to read the manual before using a new piece of workout equipment....

Well, that was an interminable wait for glitter and sequins, right ballroom fans? But the downtime is finally over; welcome to the 28th season ofDancing With the Stars! But all the drama should be behind us now, right? Eric McCandless/ABC Its so difficult when you are so tall as you are, said judge Len Goodman. It just needed a little more smoothness and a little more elegance. He played the bongos, too!...

Wed have our first hospitalized pro of the season. Hallelujah, A Dream Is A Wish Your Heart Makes (Disney!) or anything by Hole (Golf! Credit: Craig Sjodin/ABC Enough already with the golf) would have been more appropriate. Tons of dancing this Tuesday! I tried to play the hidden pictures game (anyone rememberHighlightsmagazine?) N-Bed looked like Scar-Jo with that red dress and hair, I thought. Best part: Laceys full-twisting leap into Dmitrys arms on the line if theres a soulmate for everyone....