For example, did you know that all Racers are promised a two-to-one tranny-to-player ratio in all matters karaoke?
Thats a great deal!
Wow, its a good thing the Race wasnt happening now.
Credit: Sonja Flemming/CBS
I imagine Jaimes browbeating would not have gone over quite as well during a coup.
There was an odd moment at the beginning that left me utterly confused for a few minutes.
Is there a penalty for that, too?
Do I now have to sit at my desk for four hours before I can start recapping again?
Stop talking to him!
Anyway, thatll be twenty bucks.
The teams are clearly getting more competitive.
You know someones truly bounced back from heatstroke when they have the presence of mind to screw someone over.
Why the hell cant they bark English like the rest of us?
At the boatyard, the Roadblock involved attaching a propeller to a long-tail boat.
Margie finished first, and Luke told her to see to it to bring their bags into the boat.
Why were the producers wasting time with all this talk of bags?
Of course these people needed their bags, its a no-brainer!
What kind of dope would…oh, whoops, never mind.
Continue with your foreshadowing.
Both teams realized their mistake, and just as quickly dismissed it.
And now for something odd that I noticed that I wonder if anyone else did.
When Jaime dashed to the boatyard for the Roadblock, I noticed that she was slightly…asymmetrical.
How do I put this delicately: She had one headlight on?
She was winking at me?
One of her turkeys was done?
Am I not making myself clear?
Lets just say that in the chest region, one side was popping out, the other wasnt.
Now, I had no intention of including such a gauche observation in my recap.
Nipplest, rendering it invisible.
Was it strategically placed as a demure cover-up?
What else could it have been?
NEXT: Dentures or transvestites?
The Detour that awaited everybody was Broken Teeth or Broken Record.
I get the karaoke cab, but the dentures?
Is it a daily Bangkok routine to jam dentures into peoples mouths on the streets?
Margie and Luke, in first place, opted for Broken Teeth, the only team to do so.
Margie said, Im a bad singer, but hes areeeeeallybad singer.
I figured, well spare the people of Bangkok.
This brings up an unrelated pet peeve of mine that Ive been looking for a forum to air.
My question is, why was he such an inspiration?
Hes blind, not mute.
If he was in an archery competition,thatwould make him an inspiration.
Just as if Luke was areeeeallygood singer, that would makehiman inspiration.
Okay, back to the show at hand.
Thanks for indulging me.
Margie has a nursing background so, as she said, it was easier to invade someones personal space.
(And by space, she meant piehole.)
Im pretty sure at one point he tried to attach a propeller to one womans tongue.
Tammy and Victor and the cheerleaders jumped into taxis with their complimentary set of tranny backup singers.
It was the happiest Id seen Jaime all Race, but I can relate.
Oh,Amazing Racetransvestites, I will snuffle after the last refrain.
You taught a nation how to singandhow to tuck.
Everyone seemed to enjoy the singing trannies.
My next question was, Why do they wear so much makeup?
Third question was, Why are we in a party taxi with three transvestites?
Good questions, all!
NEXT: What is Michael smuggling in his bag?
Meanwhile, Mark and Michael were not having a good time yet.
Michael was pressing for now, as he kept referring to important stuff in that bag thats not replaceable.
Mark became angry that his brothers belongings were more important to him than winning.
It was a difficult debate to settle without knowing just what this unnamed stuff was that Michael was hoarding.
Was it mementoes from home, or trinkets hed picked up along the way?
Players cant spare any cash, so he probably wouldnt be buying any souvenirs.
He was that way when the Race started?
Never mind then, its probably just a Transylvania snow globe.
Rub it in, why dont you!
How did he manage to find the one spelunking cabbie in all of Bangkok?
Wait a minute, arent they stuntmen?
Ill be damned, now he found the one rock-climbing cabbie in Bangkok!
What else does he have in his knapsack of fun, and what could he get for it?
Perhaps by handing over just one allen wrench (very expensive!)
he could get the one Ikea-obsessed cabbie in Bangkok to give him and Michael really tiny foot massages.
Damn, those guys can not catch a break!
Either that or those guys can not read a rule book.
And what would be more fun than doing it to the same team two weeks in a row?
Next week Id penalize them six hours for not skipping to the mat.
Anything to take my mind off the constant jet lag.
(They had been around 50 minutes behind, judging from the brothers penalty clock.)
What do you think about these suddenly-revealed penalties?
Or are you glad Mark and Michael got saved?
And are you looking forward to next weeks (literal) bitch-slap between Jen and Luke?
